Toy Story but Make It a Crime Documentary

🎙 Moose on the Loose: “Toy Story but Make It a Crime Documentary”

What if Toy Story wasn’t a heart-warming Pixar classic… but the twisted origin story of a misunderstood kid framed by his toys?

This week, Jasmin and special guest Chibbsy (from 1001 Songs That Make You Want to Die) reopen the cold case of Sid Phillips, the so-called “villain” next door. Was he really evil—or just a young innovator with access to too many fireworks?

Expect heated debate, questionable legal theories, and a full psychological profile of Woody (spoiler: it’s not flattering). Plus, the usual Moose chaos — including Two Mooses and a Lie, Moose, Marry, Avoid, and an uncomfortable amount of dinosaur flirting.

🦌 Part pop culture analysis, part crime doc, all moose.

Transcript

00:02.16
Chibbsy
Thank you.

00:26.04
Jasmin
Hello listeners, welcome back to episode four Moose on the Loose. ah I'm here and my name is Jasmine for any of you who haven't listened to us yet and ah usually I'd say Cherie's here but Cherie is off living her best life having a holiday in Queensland, that bitch.

00:46.33
Jasmin
So I've had to get a fill in and we have Chibs here from 1001 Songs That Make You Want to Die fame. Hi Chibs.

00:53.57
Chibbsy
Hey, hello. I'm ready to be a moose on the loose.

00:59.35
Jasmin
Some people also call him that hot guy.

01:02.75
Chibbsy
No, they don't.

01:03.15
Jasmin
like could just be, well, I mean, I've been saying it a lot.

01:06.56
Chibbsy
That's weird. we

01:08.84
Jasmin
People might not have seen you, but um Chibs actually exudes this really like masculine virility. and so like I've got a neighbour And she's 90. Her name's Janine.

01:22.70
Jasmin
And she's come over and said to me, look, Jasmine, I'm really concerned that at my advanced age, I'm going to get pregnant just having Chibbsy next door.

01:29.78
Chibbsy
She's like 62 years old. It's like 90 years old. That's all right. that that's that's also never happened.

01:34.42
Jasmin
She's afraid of your virility.

01:41.13
Chibbsy
Yeah.

01:41.80
Jasmin
Well, Chibbsy's here and Chibbsy got to choose ah what what movie we were doing, what couple of villains and heroes we were doing.

01:49.76
Chibbsy
Yeah.

01:49.69
Jasmin
And but first the the answer was, I don't watch children's movies. And then I said, cast your mind back.

01:57.54
Chibbsy
and Yeah, no, that's not 100% true. it wasn't, I don't watch, it's like I haven't watched a child's movie since 2008, say.

02:08.26
Chibbsy
i so Yeah, yeah.

02:10.00
Jasmin
Since you were a child.

02:11.79
Chibbsy
no No, that's not even true. That can't be true. I'd say 2018.

02:19.95
Jasmin
What was it?

02:22.25
Chibbsy
Probably Frozen or something, I guess. I don't know. Yeah.

02:25.49
Jasmin
That's right, you've got kids.

02:27.03
Chibbsy
Yeah, I've got kids.

02:27.32
Jasmin
Yeah, I'm sure you've been.

02:27.87
Chibbsy
Like, I have seen it. Yeah, and yeah, I didn't enjoy many of them. But yeah, Frozen's probably the last one that was a like on all the time in the house, couldn't avoid it, Frozen.

02:36.19
Jasmin
Hmm.

02:41.72
Jasmin
yeah

02:42.04
Chibbsy
I think by the time I had my son, um I had already decided I'd had enough of the child char movies and just made him watch like Predator on repeat or something.

02:50.77
Jasmin
Mad Max and stuff.

02:52.12
Chibbsy
yeah This is Arnold Schwarzenegger.

02:55.64
Jasmin
Yeah.

02:56.44
Chibbsy
He's a US Marine somehow.

02:57.98
Jasmin
Yeah.

02:58.56
Chibbsy
but but Yeah.

02:58.98
Jasmin
Oh, now he's pregnant and he's got a little tiny brother named Danny DeVito.

03:01.90
Chibbsy
yeah

03:02.66
Jasmin
Yeah.

03:03.34
Chibbsy
All different movies.

03:03.14
Jasmin
Honey movies, yeah.

03:05.25
Chibbsy
I just did a cut. I just cut up all of his movies in the one funny 15 minute movie.

03:08.24
Jasmin
annie movies yeah

03:10.30
Chibbsy
Yeah.

03:11.63
Jasmin
Well, we can't do Frozen because Cherie would kill me. and That's one of her all-time favourites. But we did land on Toy Story. So the first thing we're going to do is that I'm going to give a little off-the-cuff summary of what I remember Toy Story being about.

03:28.27
Chibbsy
Yeah, sure.

03:28.28
Jasmin
So feel free to jump in if I'm incorrect because I also have not watched it since 2000 and whatever, something.

03:30.53
Chibbsy
No, I want to hear your synopsis of Toy Story. I'd love to. Yeah.

03:38.50
Chibbsy
Yeah.

03:41.29
Jasmin
memory there are toys in everyone's rooms but this one is on one specific child's room his name is Andy and all toys in the world come to life but only when people aren't looking and they run around and have their own life but they're just desperate for the child to come back to the room and play with them and now that I'm saying it out loud it seems really creepy

03:44.80
Chibbsy
Hmm.

04:07.15
Chibbsy
the They want to play dead. but All they want to do is be dead, lifeless things that get thrown around by a child.

04:10.53
Jasmin
yeah

04:14.91
Jasmin
Yeah, wouldn't the child enjoy it more if they were up being alive all the time? All

04:22.95
Chibbsy
Yeah, I would imagine so.

04:24.18
Jasmin
right, so if they were thinking of Andy's needs, I mean, what would happen if the world found out toys are animated? What would be different?

04:32.89
Chibbsy
ah it'd be chaos.

04:37.02
Jasmin
Oh, that would throw the world into chaos?

04:38.50
Chibbsy
Yeah, yeah, yeah, 100%.

04:43.04
Jasmin
Yeah, right.

04:45.70
Jasmin
I feel like rather than being chaos, it would be like having an army an army of little helpers.

04:52.62
Chibbsy
Yeah, but we don't know what the true spirit of these toys are. Andy's ones seem fine, but we don't know. Sid's toys seem menacing.

05:03.75
Jasmin
No, Sid's toys were nothing but helpful and sweet. He ripped about good toys.

05:07.66
Chibbsy
But scary looking. Scary looking, though.

05:09.38
Jasmin
Oh, and as we know, if someone looks different to us, they are wrong.

05:15.60
Chibbsy
Yeah, it sends the world into chaos.

05:17.57
Jasmin
is word yeah

05:19.65
Chibbsy
Yeah.

05:19.39
Jasmin
Well, okay. So yeah, in the movie, yeah what happens? Oh, a new toy comes along, Buzz Lightyear, doesn't realise that he's a toy.

05:28.19
Chibbsy
Mm-hmm.

05:28.09
Jasmin
ah Andy quickly latches onto him as now this is my favourite toy. His previous favourite toy, Woody the cowboy, gets displaced and because they're kind of fighting over who's going to be Andy's main dude, they fall out a window And they eventually end up at the next door neighbour's house.

05:47.28
Jasmin
The next door neighbour is, and remember this is, ah you know, this podcast at the moment is about are they a villain or a hero? He's supposed to be the villain.

05:58.11
Jasmin
But I would argue he's a creative genius who doesn't have ah an outlet besides, you know, mutilating toys, ripping them apart and stitching them back together.

06:06.91
Chibbsy
Yeah, it didn't didn't seem like a happy household he was coming from.

06:11.87
Jasmin
They had a dog.

06:14.80
Chibbsy
Yeah.

06:14.61
Jasmin
had a little sister. She she seemed all right. What are you basing this on?

06:17.69
Chibbsy
It was a psychopath.

06:18.93
Jasmin
Oh, because he's a psych... Okay, but you said he didn't come from a happy home, suggesting the home was making him into a psychopath, but the home seemed right, I thought.

06:25.43
Chibbsy
Yeah. No, the sister was a psychopath.

06:28.73
Jasmin
What do you mean?

06:32.44
Chibbsy
The sister little sister was crazy.

06:34.67
Jasmin
What was she... Why? I don't remember anything that would have made...

06:37.71
Chibbsy
I don't, have no, I have a vague recollection, but I imagine I can just think back and think that sister was probably driving him crazy.

06:46.80
Jasmin
She was having a tea party with Mrs. Nesbitt and the rest of the toys.

06:50.37
Chibbsy
That's right. Yeah, yeah.

06:51.09
Jasmin
Yes.

06:52.08
Chibbsy
What a lunatic.

06:53.26
Jasmin
What a... Yeah, okay. You know, you have to give evidence to back up your claims on this podcast, buddy.

06:55.62
Chibbsy
Yeah.

07:00.38
Chibbsy
No, it's the whole thing of Sid. Yeah, definitely misplaced. but not lacking in intelligence or creativity at all.

07:12.02
Jasmin
Yeah, also I'm just...

07:12.44
Chibbsy
He's quite the engine engineer.

07:14.54
Jasmin
Yeah, I'm just kidding also. You don't have to give evidence to back up your claims on this podcast.

07:17.95
Chibbsy
ah

07:18.18
Jasmin
let You say whatever you like.

07:20.01
Chibbsy
ah That's good.

07:21.76
Jasmin
Okay, well, what happens in the end? they they Spoiler alert, if you haven't seen this since 1995, it's bad luck, quite frankly. I'm not going to curb my summary for those people that still haven't watched it.

07:35.63
Chibbsy
Yeah, there's been like eight of them.

07:37.23
Jasmin
And there's been like so many of them. Catch up.

07:39.63
Chibbsy
Yeah.

07:40.38
Jasmin
He, if Woody and Buzz, while they're trying to get home, end up making friends with each other and then they learn to live in harmony after they don't get exploded by Sid's rocket.

07:53.07
Chibbsy
Yeah, that's right. Yeah.

07:54.05
Jasmin
Yeah.

07:55.72
Chibbsy
Yeah.

07:55.95
Jasmin
Yeah. Okay.

07:56.88
Chibbsy
He was blowing toys up in the backyard.

07:59.49
Jasmin
I mean, he was just testing out his rocket. How would you test out a rocket?

08:04.62
Chibbsy
It's pretty rad that he had ah that call of a rocket.

08:07.30
Jasmin
And he seemed like he'd gotten it in the post himself. Again, possibly a gifted child.

08:12.86
Chibbsy
Yeah.

08:15.34
Chibbsy
used to be a real Used to be a real society when you could order explosives in the mail. Some people got explosives in the mail and they didn't order them. And then they were like, oh, there's a madman sending explosives in the mail.

08:27.60
Chibbsy
Yeah.

08:30.82
Jasmin
wi Did that happen?

08:33.78
Chibbsy
Yeah, it's the Unabomber. Yeah, the Unabomber.

08:35.92
Jasmin
Oh, right. I'm thinking I remember anthrax being a mailed thing. I can't remember the bomb thing being.

08:39.87
Chibbsy
Yeah, Unabomber was before the Anthrax. Before Anthrax, yeah.

08:42.31
Jasmin
Yeah, right.

08:43.90
Chibbsy
Yeah.

08:43.86
Jasmin
I'm just not across my terrorist events in the same way as you guys are.

08:49.04
Chibbsy
Well, on the, yeah, 1001 Songs That Make Want to Die podcast, we delve into White Terror quite a lot.

08:55.81
Jasmin
Yeah, right.

08:57.29
Chibbsy
Yeah. Yeah.

08:57.26
Jasmin
In the affirmative or just delving?

09:00.36
Chibbsy
Just no one talks about white terror. The terror, like, terror is is always pushed towards a certain minority, and it's not fair because there's white terror.

09:09.26
Jasmin
ah Oh, yeah, I'd agree with that. There is white terror, 100%.

09:12.51
Chibbsy
Yeah. And Ted Kaczynski, the a.k.a.

09:13.01
Jasmin
said Okay, good.

09:15.32
Chibbsy
the Unabomber, was quite the white terrorist.

09:19.76
Jasmin
Yeah, right. Well, no one's pissed off more than white people, are they?

09:24.44
Chibbsy
Hard done by. Yeah. yep

09:29.54
Jasmin
all right. So we can do our... We can do our formal argument, if you would like, about whether Sid was the villain or actually the victim. Or do you think we've covered this?

09:42.23
Jasmin
Or do you think we need to formally argue about this?

09:42.87
Chibbsy
No, look, it is no it is hard to argue. He is a great villain of movies. Like, he kind of has the whole thing. His face looks bad. Yeah, bad, evil laugh.

09:52.71
Jasmin
because of his laugh. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

09:57.00
Chibbsy
and But boss it was toys. He wasn't doing it to dogs or cats in the neighbourhood or anything. They were toys.

10:06.22
Jasmin
and

10:07.06
Chibbsy
And he didn't know they were alive. Yeah. what What I think is more interesting to discuss is that they decide to come to life at the end of that movie and sort of like go full zombie on him, like the toys are alive, which would fuck that kid up a lot.

10:24.15
Jasmin
I

10:29.20
Chibbsy
So with where's Sid like 15 years on, 20 years on from that?

10:30.09
Jasmin
feel sorry for Ceed.

10:39.50
Chibbsy
Did it ruin his life?

10:40.87
Jasmin
I mean, he's he's still...

10:41.50
Chibbsy
And was that worth ruining his life? For him not being able blow up some toys that no one else in the world knows are sentient beings, his life is ruined. He might be a homeless person with a severe drug problem.

10:56.39
Jasmin
Well, he's probably in a crazy house still trying to convince people that the toys did come alive. Or he's like been convinced that it was all in his head. And then if if a one ever does come to life, he's like, no, no, no, no.

11:04.07
Chibbsy
Yeah.

11:06.26
Jasmin
I did therapy for this for a long time. No, no, they never came alive.

11:09.54
Chibbsy
i want to say that I want to see the Sid movie. I want to see Sid as a 45-year-old trying to keep his job, but trying to keep a girlfriend, just trying to get through his day-to-day life.

11:22.32
Chibbsy
But he had this super traumatic thing happen to him as a kid.

11:25.68
Jasmin
It's Jumanji, isn't it? It's Jumanji when she says, you know, you got sucked into a board game and bats chased me down the street and no one ever believed me and now I'm an adult and it's happening again.

11:28.44
Chibbsy
Is it Jumanji?

11:37.47
Jasmin
She's like, no, no, no, no. She tries to make a, she tries to ring a therapist up.

11:39.42
Chibbsy
Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's right.

11:43.27
Jasmin
Yeah, it's it.

11:44.02
Chibbsy
It is. Yeah, it's a Jumanji situation.

11:44.27
Jasmin
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

11:46.91
Chibbsy
Yeah. So, because, like, Andy gets to grow up just blissfully unaware that anything is happening.

11:55.97
Jasmin
He really did love that cowboy. Yeah, it probably is not worth Okay, but but would Sid have moved on to animals and then people after torturing toys?

12:07.84
Jasmin
If it wasn't doing it for him anymore and he needs to go to the next level, did they actually save?

12:08.19
Chibbsy
Nah, I don't think so.

12:13.18
Chibbsy
You think he was being aroused by the toy mutilation?

12:16.88
Jasmin
I mean, I don't know about sexually aroused, but just like a sense of power.

12:23.86
Jasmin
And then he has to.

12:24.29
Chibbsy
Where was he not... So where was he lacking a sense of power in his everyday life that he had to take it out on toys?

12:29.36
Jasmin
I don't know what's happened to Sid in the past.

12:30.43
Chibbsy
He had a dog.

12:31.73
Jasmin
That dog was a pig dog. It's a universal symbol symbol of boganism. I

12:40.85
Jasmin
assume his parents drug a lot.

12:43.76
Chibbsy
Right, okay. And a two-story house.

12:48.09
Jasmin
are America, aren't they?

12:50.74
Chibbsy
No, they're not!

12:53.48
Jasmin
We don't have to have evidence to back up our claims on this podcast. Why do I have to explain this again to you?

12:58.92
Chibbsy
ah

12:59.67
Jasmin
I

13:00.28
Chibbsy
Everybody knows that in the United States, all houses two or more stories.

13:07.83
Jasmin
don't You watch babies. They seem to be on big blocks. They all seem to be bigger than our houses.

13:12.24
Chibbsy
Have you seen the meme it pops up in my algorithm all the time of... There's a few different what Toy Story related ones, but there's the one where I think it's got like Woody with his face of shock and it's like...

13:26.95
Chibbsy
Andy's toys when he turns 14 and his parents go out. You know what mean? Like something like basically just that they've got witness Andy just fucking jacking off constantly in the room.

13:37.79
Jasmin
ah

13:40.54
Chibbsy
The toys are just there.

13:42.82
Jasmin
ah

13:44.51
Chibbsy
finding a different toy in Andy's mum's room, you know, all this stuff. And, yeah, there's lots of different toy story, things like that. But, yeah, yeah.

13:54.76
Jasmin
Toy Story is wholesome. I don't know that people need to always go there. Relax, people.

13:59.94
Chibbsy
What?

14:00.30
Jasmin
Let it be wholesome. It can just be wholesome.

14:03.32
Chibbsy
He's got toys all over his room.

14:05.40
Jasmin
but they've been putting them, yeah.

14:05.78
Chibbsy
They're alive. Alive. Imagine knowing that. Just even if you weren't jacking off all the time in your room, but you were just talking to yourself or doing weird shit that you do in your room by yourself, and now you realise my toys are alive, they've seen everything, and they do know and judge me on it.

14:29.89
Jasmin
And they still want to be your friends? I think you'd feel pretty safe. Yeah.

14:36.05
Chibbsy
it it's It's not a good look for the toys.

14:39.60
Jasmin
That they were lying the whole time.

14:41.34
Chibbsy
That they're happy to sit and watch that sort of thing and be like, no, it's all right.

14:43.73
Jasmin
Yeah, under false pretenses.

14:45.29
Chibbsy
It's all right. It's okay. That's cool.

14:47.43
Jasmin
You're

14:50.14
Chibbsy
Like, we don't know that you know, it's 95. So in and a few years time, Andy was watching like Al-Qaeda beheading videos in his room while the toys were watching.

15:00.68
Jasmin
making me sad. Stop talking about terror.

15:05.38
Jasmin
I'm not Gav. um I'm more like Bevo. Pretend you're just on a call with Bevo, okay? You can't handle it. Okay, well, we'll make a call on this at the end, but it is not looking good for andy and his toys.

15:23.06
Jasmin
You made a very compelling argument.

15:23.57
Chibbsy
Nah, it is alright. I would be curious to know what Sid's future looks like after the ending of that movie.

15:33.91
Jasmin
I would be curious either way, as in he, you know, the toys came alive, he saw it and he got really scared. But the other direction, if if nobody ever stopped him from mutilating toys, does he become Dharma?

15:44.85
Chibbsy
Like a sliding doors moment.

15:46.88
Jasmin
Yeah. Did they save us from another Dharma? don't know.

15:50.06
Chibbsy
I don't think Sid was gay.

15:55.30
Jasmin
i was referring to his sexual organ fetish.

16:00.26
Chibbsy
um

16:03.63
Jasmin
I just need a hit or there if he's gay.

16:09.99
Jasmin
and Okay. Well, Chips, are you ready to play Two Mooses and a Lie with me?

16:18.64
Chibbsy
Yes. Yes, I am.

16:19.19
Jasmin
Yeah, going to fuck you up. Here we go.

16:32.78
Jasmin
I'm going to get you good.

16:33.52
Chibbsy
That'll do.

16:34.38
Jasmin
going to get you good. Okay, here we go. Okay, two of these are true and one is a filthy moose lie. You've got to tell me which one's the lie.

16:45.18
Chibbsy
Oh, damn it. I'm looking at our run sheet and I was really hoping you wouldn't have thought about this at all and actually just written them down.

16:49.84
Jasmin
ah

16:51.05
Chibbsy
like

16:51.92
Jasmin
ah Oh, yeah, I'm on a separate page that you can't see right now, my friend.

16:52.25
Chibbsy
She's thought of everything. yeah

16:57.64
Chibbsy
and okay

16:58.14
Jasmin
I know, that's so likely to be so forward thinking, but I just really want to crush you like a bug.

17:01.71
Chibbsy
Amazing. Yeah, i honestly, I just scrolled down. I'm like, I'll be here. Yeah. Yeah.

17:06.89
Jasmin
I'm a podcaster, young man.

17:08.69
Chibbsy
Sure.

17:10.55
Jasmin
Okay, number one, Woody was originally written as a sarcastic ventriloquist dummy. Two, Tom Hanks recorded half his lines in his garage.

17:24.95
Jasmin
Feel free to react to any of them at any point. You want to hear them all. Okay. Three, the Pizza Planet truck was based on John Lasseter's real food van.

17:28.51
Chibbsy
so

17:34.01
Jasmin
Good luck, you sumbitch.

17:35.66
Chibbsy
Yeah.

17:35.62
Jasmin
Help

17:39.00
Chibbsy
um

17:39.75
Jasmin
me if you need hear again.

17:40.43
Chibbsy
Okay. Okay. No, no, no. I got it. I got it. I got it. He was ah going to be a ah dummy. He was originally going to be a dummy. Tom Hanks recorded half the script in his garage.

17:52.86
Chibbsy
I imagine Tom Hanks has a pretty nice garage. Like, it's not like mine. It's not going. Chip's recorded in the pet pot. Yeah. It's probably a pretty good garage. So don't think that's that crazy.

18:04.32
Chibbsy
And who's the food fan? Is it the director or something? Is it?

18:08.21
Jasmin
I don't know. I don't know.

18:10.05
Chibbsy
You don't know.

18:10.33
Jasmin
I don't know.

18:12.05
Chibbsy
Who is it? Who is it? What's the guy's name?

18:13.85
Jasmin
ChatGPT says John Lasseter.

18:15.64
Chibbsy
Yeah. John Lassie. Like, i don't know. Who's John? Yeah. Okay. So he's the director. you He's the, yeah, chief creative officer at Pixar and a director.

18:26.12
Jasmin
Oh, that's John Lasseter. I've seen that face. He's in things.

18:29.03
Chibbsy
Yeah. Okay. Right. So, yeah, this guy's directed Toy Story, A Bug's Life, Toy Story 2, Cars. Okay. So it's based on his food truck.

18:39.21
Jasmin
Mm-hmm.

18:40.82
Chibbsy
like Okay. um what Why would he have a food truck? But, yeah, people are weird. So I'm going to go with um the dummy is a lie.

18:54.54
Chibbsy
Number one is a lie. Is that a good moose or a bad moose?

18:57.69
Jasmin
No, it's the only sound I have and it's wrong. You are wrong.

19:06.11
Chibbsy
ah We need a more positive sounding moose.

19:05.90
Jasmin
Yay.

19:08.99
Chibbsy
It's like moose that's like...

19:08.76
Jasmin
I know.

19:10.87
Chibbsy
memer but Yeah, yeah, yeah.

19:12.30
Jasmin
that's a good one. Yeah, I'll do that for next time. Okay.

19:15.33
Chibbsy
yeah

19:16.72
Jasmin
My friend, you were so close. John Lasseter doesn't have a food ban.

19:22.03
Chibbsy
Yeah, I mean...

19:21.82
Jasmin
He ain't got time for that.

19:24.49
Chibbsy
I mean, who knows?

19:25.47
Jasmin
I know, it was a hard one.

19:25.78
Chibbsy
Like...

19:26.71
Jasmin
and um Yeah, this friend like what little boy is playing with a ventriloquist dummy?

19:30.12
Chibbsy
would have a a... That... Now, I can tell you how that kid grows up. That kid grows up to be dumb.

19:38.26
Jasmin
I think that kid grows up to like hand puppets and there's nothing wrong with that.

19:43.47
Chibbsy
There's a lot wrong with it.

19:44.75
Jasmin
What? Such as? Is it that?

19:48.31
Chibbsy
Just the amount of time it takes to pick one, really. Like, if it was a quick... Apparently, puppetry is not a swift hobby. I'll tell you that much.

19:56.22
Jasmin
ah

19:57.13
Chibbsy
It's not something that gets done quickly.

19:56.98
Jasmin
Can you, would you like to give the listeners the example that you're referring to?

20:02.12
Chibbsy
Oh, well, okay.

20:02.08
Jasmin
or would would you like me to tell that story or would you like to tell it?

20:05.48
Chibbsy
It's fine. do you I mean, you can tell it and then I'll say i'll say how that's not correct.

20:07.18
Jasmin
I'll tell it my version. Oh, okay. I might say it exactly right. So Chips and i ventured to Exmouth in w a There's a long drive getting there. We should have flown.

20:22.52
Jasmin
These may be details that aren't pertinent to the story. And when we got there, not exactly when we got there, it's not like we were heaps tired or anything. it was probably the next day or something. We went to this like,

20:34.65
Jasmin
um

20:37.60
Jasmin
what sort of shop was it?

20:38.00
Chibbsy
It's like news agency.

20:39.06
Jasmin
It's like a news agency gift shop sort of thing.

20:41.79
Chibbsy
Yeah.

20:41.63
Jasmin
Anyway, hand puppets, as far as the eye can see. Oh, my God, every different animal you can think of. Now, one of us likes hand puppets. It's not chips. And I chose one and we left.

20:53.61
Jasmin
There, that in case closed. That's the story.

20:56.64
Chibbsy
No, that's not, you and i absolutely nailed it. It's just that the, between the, there were hand puppets there and chose one was around, I don't know, 74 minutes.

21:09.55
Jasmin
what we

21:10.13
Chibbsy
74 minutes of trying puppets with different characters and voices and names.

21:16.08
Jasmin
74 minutes, you reckon?

21:17.03
Chibbsy
Like that's like 74 minutes. People are like, that's not that crazy. Yeah, it is. It is.

21:22.71
Jasmin
It's crazy.

21:24.19
Chibbsy
It's a fucking long time to watch someone try puppets on.

21:28.89
Jasmin
So you're just waiting until we're on a podcast together to tell me you think I'm crazy?

21:33.35
Chibbsy
I've told you this.

21:34.39
Jasmin
I don't remember you saying crazy.

21:35.78
Chibbsy
I've said that that is a long time to try puppets out.

21:38.78
Jasmin
I was having fun.

21:41.60
Chibbsy
You have the time your life.

21:42.75
Jasmin
Yeah. And Chips like started off with this like good-natured smile, you know, letting me do as what I'm doing.

21:43.98
Chibbsy
Yeah.

21:51.01
Jasmin
But by the end of it.

21:51.69
Chibbsy
I thought once you'd gone through them all, I'm like, there's only, say, 12 puppets here. So she's spending around two, three minutes per puppet.

22:00.94
Jasmin
You were doing maths.

22:01.89
Chibbsy
We'll be out of here we'll be out of here in 20 minutes. No worries. I can do 20 minutes. She's having the time of her life. Let her have fun for 20 minutes. I didn't know you were going to go back and forth between them and then sometimes end up with two puppets on each, like at each hand and they would talk and see how that went.

22:14.23
Jasmin
Talking to each other.

22:17.17
Chibbsy
And so I'm like, wow. So the combinations are really throwing up here because now we're going two at a time, but we're going to have different combinations. And I'm trying, I'm not good at maths. I can't work out how many combinations of puppets this will be and how long it'll go for.

22:29.66
Jasmin
yeah. yeah

22:31.93
Chibbsy
Yeah.

22:31.66
Jasmin
And I got one. They're $100 each. I think you got for me. So you're very supportive of my hobby. ah But yeah. I remember my best joke and I don't know why I didn't end up getting the kangaroo. The best joke was having the kangaroo and then I could say to the kids, come on, hop to it.

22:47.32
Jasmin
Whenever I wanted them to do a joke.

22:47.88
Chibbsy
Yeah, that was the best joke. And that's how you know how good all the other jokes were from all the other puppets.

22:52.88
Jasmin
Hop to it. and All right. Well, yeah.

22:57.38
Chibbsy
Okay, so very good. I got it wrong.

23:01.40
Jasmin
Chibs is wrong the point.

23:04.33
Chibbsy
Yeah.

23:04.07
Jasmin
um Would you, mean, the next game doesn't have a right or wrong answer, so that might help you for the simpletons that can't get things right.

23:10.33
Chibbsy
Great. Cool.

23:11.68
Jasmin
Are to play Moose, Marry, Avoid?

23:13.41
Chibbsy
You're just stoked it's not you doing it for once.

23:16.06
Jasmin
I know, because I'm always wrong. I'm doing that Sid Power thing. I'm like putting someone else down to make myself feel better. That's all it is.

23:24.23
Chibbsy
Strapping them to a rocket.

23:25.68
Jasmin
Oh, I would never strap you to a rocket unless you upset me.

23:33.25
Jasmin
Here we go

23:41.82
Chibbsy
Great stinger.

23:44.15
Jasmin
My boyfriend made that for me. Okay. ah Here we go. Moose marry avoid. Now, are you across this game, Chibs? You understand what moose means?

23:54.35
Chibbsy
um no explain what moose means.

23:56.73
Jasmin
ah You know exactly what it means. You just want to hear me explain it. i It was meant to mean anything sexual at the start. We were sort of just sort of saying moose in a voice, but it's definitely come to mean fuck. It means fuck.

24:08.63
Chibbsy
Okay, all right, okay.

24:09.09
Jasmin
Who would you fuck? So Woody, Buzz, Rex, who are you moosing? Who you marrying? Who are you avoiding?

24:15.60
Chibbsy
Wait, what? this's They're all this? What?

24:20.09
Jasmin
Woody, Buzz and Rex.

24:22.37
Chibbsy
he didn't You couldn't chuck like a Bo Peep in there or anything?

24:25.79
Jasmin
Oh, how insecure is your sexuality, my friend?

24:30.86
Chibbsy
i don't want to have to, I mean, um I'm obviously moosing Rex.

24:37.66
Jasmin
Obviously. In what way? He's got tiny little hands.

24:40.28
Chibbsy
It's a dinosaur.

24:40.37
Jasmin
What can he do for you?

24:41.94
Chibbsy
It's a dinosaur.

24:44.37
Jasmin
He's the least like a human.

24:46.99
Chibbsy
It's a dinosaur. Can you imagine the stories you've got to tell people if you're just like, you won't believe what happened to me on Tuesday afternoon?

24:57.89
Jasmin
I think married a dinosaur, you'd also have a story to tell. Oh,

25:02.14
Chibbsy
um don't want to... No, he's annoying. wouldn't want to have to spend rest my life with the T-Rex.

25:05.47
Jasmin
he's annoying.

25:08.34
Jasmin
Okay, all right.

25:08.66
Chibbsy
Plus, fucking useless with the arms.

25:11.85
Jasmin
Oh, yeah, can't help around the house. Forgot about that.

25:14.91
Chibbsy
Yeah.

25:15.64
Jasmin
ah He's so much like me. Just tiny arms and uses them as an excuse to get out of doing stuff.

25:21.82
Chibbsy
yeah

25:25.19
Jasmin
I can't, honey. My arms are too small. ah Yeah, so you're going to moose the dinosaur. This deck game doesn't have any winners. This is a conversation that we're having.

25:35.90
Jasmin
Who are you marrying?

25:36.54
Chibbsy
yeah ah Woody.

25:39.10
Jasmin
I think Woody's sweet too. Yeah, I'd probably marry Woody.

25:41.21
Chibbsy
Yeah. yeah

25:42.42
Jasmin
um ha Happily avoid Buzz. He seems annoying.

25:45.09
Chibbsy
Buzz is just piece of annoying as shit.

25:47.69
Jasmin
Yep.

25:48.40
Chibbsy
Yeah.

25:48.47
Jasmin
Yep.

25:49.11
Chibbsy
Yep.

25:49.07
Jasmin
Thinks he's not a toy and all that stuff.

25:51.45
Chibbsy
be so frustrating. Yeah. I'd be like, yeah, no, 100% you could fly. You should fly. fly Go do that.

25:58.39
Jasmin
Fly out the window.

26:00.04
Chibbsy
Yeah.

26:00.69
Jasmin
Bonus round. Here we go. Andy's mum, Bo Peep, Mrs Potato Head.

26:03.21
Chibbsy
Okay.

26:07.24
Chibbsy
Oh, bonus round. Okay. um Do we ever see what Andy's mum looked like?

26:13.96
Jasmin
Yeah, she's hot.

26:15.94
Chibbsy
Great.

26:16.27
Jasmin
Yeah, nothing wrong with Andy's mum.

26:16.65
Chibbsy
Okay. Okay. wow Well, that's the only human in there, so let's move Sandy's mum. Yeah,

26:23.92
Jasmin
I mean, Bo Peep is porcelain and that could go terribly wrong, but what are you going to do? Marry her?

26:30.75
Chibbsy
they'd have to marry Bo Peep and then avoid Mrs Potato Head.

26:34.04
Jasmin
Because she's annoying?

26:35.67
Chibbsy
She's nagging. Yeah, yeah.

26:36.96
Jasmin
It's common theme here. You don't like being around annoying people.

26:42.16
Chibbsy
I think that's a common theme in humanity.

26:45.40
Jasmin
Then why we around them so much? They're everywhere.

26:47.93
Chibbsy
They're everywhere. You can't avoid them. Yeah. But maybe I'm the annoying one. Maybe that's what it is.

26:53.88
Jasmin
Ah,

26:54.17
Chibbsy
It's like, you know, when, yeah, you think, you know, you smell shit all day, like eventually just, yeah, you've stepped in shit.

26:59.89
Jasmin
yeah. If you don't know, yeah. If everyone, there's an annoying one and you don't know who they are.

27:04.67
Chibbsy
Yeah.

27:07.21
Jasmin
Yeah, that's you.

27:07.55
Chibbsy
Yeah. You might be the annoying one.

27:09.42
Jasmin
Yeah, yeah. out Well done. So all we need to do now is wrap up our conclusions about Sid. Let's do that.

27:25.44
Jasmin
Conclusion, go. Who's a villain?

27:28.52
Chibbsy
ah Sid, I'm not going to say villain. I just can't say villain. Can't say villain. Because there was...

27:37.54
Jasmin
You've come to adore him over this.

27:40.42
Chibbsy
No, it's not adoring.

27:40.36
Jasmin
I'm thinking about it.

27:41.50
Chibbsy
I just don't think... A villain needs to be like they are the only person on Earth that is doing something this evil. And I just think even on their block, there were probably four other Sid-like characters getting around that were just like...

27:58.17
Jasmin
Mutilating toys.

28:01.12
Chibbsy
People do fucked up stuff. Like they burn ants with the magnifying glass or they rip legs off ants and do...

28:07.80
Jasmin
Did your mum tell you that two wrongs don't make a right? Just because everyone else is doing it doesn't make it okay for him to do it.

28:13.06
Chibbsy
I'm not saying they're not joining up into a mutilation gang. I'm saying that they're just doing stuff that is the wrong thing to do. And he just needs some supervision. I don't know where his parents were, but if my kid was at the back but and things were exploding, would want to be like, what was that?

28:33.77
Chibbsy
What was that? And go out there and be like, oh, I'm just blowing stuff It's well, stop it, you dickhead.

28:41.17
Jasmin
Yeah. Would you take the rocket off them?

28:42.07
Chibbsy
That's it.

28:45.04
Chibbsy
ah It's pretty rad in the rocket. I'd be like, we no, just if you're going to let the rocket off, tell me.

28:51.60
Chibbsy
Tell me. Tell me about the rocket.

28:52.36
Jasmin
We'll do it safely.

28:54.16
Chibbsy
Yeah. Yeah. Goggles or something. I don't know. don't know what you need. I'm not a rocket scientist.

28:58.89
Jasmin
know, well, yeah yeah, I mean, yeah arguably would be better if you were one, if you were letting off rockets. But he also cut the, I imagine so too, and white coats.

29:05.60
Chibbsy
Sure. I imagine they all wear goggles.

29:09.72
Chibbsy
Yeah.

29:10.19
Jasmin
I don't know what the white coats are for.

29:10.64
Chibbsy
Hmm.

29:12.29
Jasmin
And I would spill something on mine immediately as soon as I put it on. Like, oh, fuck, I never have a spaghetti for lunch. The one day I put this coat on, spaghetti for lunch. And I'm a vegetarian. I don't even know why I'm eating spaghetti.

29:22.81
Chibbsy
and i did it And I forgot a fork. I'm

29:24.84
Jasmin
Never got a frog. ah Yeah, you know he cut the head off his.

29:27.82
Chibbsy
going to have to slip this up like a pig, ah scientist pig. Yeah. Yeah.

29:31.07
Jasmin
God, who I hope I'm getting on this white coat I'm wearing right now for the first time ever. Okay, are we done with that?

29:38.63
Chibbsy
yeah

29:38.59
Jasmin
That's good? Okay. So, you know he cut the head off his sister's toy, right?

29:44.07
Chibbsy
yeah

29:44.12
Jasmin
And said, I don't know, whatever it was. I can't remember. he was teasing her. And then she ran off and then he said she was lying when she dobbed on him.

29:53.93
Chibbsy
He's a piece of shit!

29:53.96
Jasmin
Is this? He said, but not a villain, just a piece of shit, not evil. The toys are actually evil for deceiving everyone and collapsing on the floor and pretending they're not alive and looking at everything you do, including getting dressed and possibly exploring your sexuality.

30:08.22
Chibbsy
They're liars. Liars.

30:09.74
Jasmin
Yeah,

30:10.49
Chibbsy
Yeah. Liars. Thiefs. That's well. They steal.

30:16.20
Jasmin
they are. They're like borrowers, aren't they?

30:18.45
Chibbsy
Yeah. um The toys are the real villains.

30:22.10
Jasmin
Oh, my God, I think we've got our first actual villain swap.

30:25.64
Chibbsy
yeah Yeah, the toys are untrustworthy, deceiving, conniving.

30:32.83
Jasmin
for it Did you look up a thesaurus to discuss these toys with me today?

30:34.89
Chibbsy
Yeah.

30:38.05
Chibbsy
I don't even know what that is.

30:41.17
Jasmin
Did you look at a big book full of synonyms?

30:45.81
Chibbsy
Ah, word book. That's what you're talking about.

30:48.20
Jasmin
The word book. Did you look at the word book?

30:49.62
Chibbsy
Yeah, yeah.

30:51.68
Jasmin
So, but if they're sentient and they seem to be basically sentient as much as we are, could you understand why they went through with that plan rather than letting one of them get literally blown up and more toys get mutilated?

30:58.66
Chibbsy
Yes.

31:07.61
Jasmin
If they're as sentient as us, is that reasonable?

31:12.23
Chibbsy
don't

31:12.00
Jasmin
There was no other plan. What else were they supposed to? Oh, they could have run next door and asked Andy's mum for help. They couldn't get out of the house.

31:20.69
Chibbsy
know. No, they were going in that house all the time.

31:23.79
Jasmin
Yeah, they got out on the skateboard with the dog and out the doggy door.

31:26.85
Chibbsy
Yeah. hu

31:28.89
Jasmin
Okay, so you're saying they should have come to life for someone else and asked that person to help get the other ones taken off the rocket.

31:36.11
Chibbsy
ring Ring the cops.

31:39.85
Jasmin
Use a phone.

31:41.22
Chibbsy
And just be like, Oi, neighbour keeps blowing shit up in their backyard. Can you please go around there and see what's going on?

31:48.92
Jasmin
They'll come around there and they'll be like, okay, like I can see you've got Buzz Lightyear strapped to that rocket. That's the last thing we're going to be letting you blow up today. we we We're all for kids exploring nature. Come on, blow your thing up while we're standing here.

31:59.96
Chibbsy
They can get around when no one's looking.

31:59.82
Jasmin
no more rockets.

32:01.29
Chibbsy
They can make as many phone calls i as they want.

32:06.42
Jasmin
Yeah. Well, they do they?

32:08.03
Chibbsy
What difference would it make? No one knows it's a toy on the other end.

32:11.87
Jasmin
Maybe they don't know phone numbers.

32:15.32
Chibbsy
nine one one 911.

32:16.98
Jasmin
their toys maybe they don't know that uh have okay oh ah yeah

32:21.48
Chibbsy
Is one of the toys a phone? is that Johnson and Friends? I get the two confused all the time.

32:28.70
Jasmin
yeah no one of them was a phone okay so I feel like I actually need to be the one to make the call on this and I'm I'm gonna say you have you've convinced me

32:30.68
Chibbsy
Okay.

32:38.79
Jasmin
You've convinced me. Sid was just creative, misunderstood, probably would have gone on to do something science-based and pretty cool. And those toys probably destroyed his life after lying to everyone forever and continuing to lie in the future. Now they're watching a little girl every day.

32:53.53
Jasmin
Ew, creepy.

32:55.37
Chibbsy
Yeah. Creepy. Yeah. They're creeps and they can't be trusted.

32:58.91
Jasmin
Woody is a creep. But Woody's voiced by Tom Hanks and

33:02.15
Chibbsy
All cowboys are fucking bizarre, anyway.

33:07.27
Jasmin
But nothing to do with Tom Hanks could ever be being a creep except for that baseball movie where peed near all those women.

33:14.73
Chibbsy
a league and A League of Their Own is one of the greatest movies ever made. I won't hear bad word said about A League of Their Own.

33:19.56
Jasmin
I'm saying, wasn't he horrible in it at the start?

33:22.71
Chibbsy
He was an alcoholic!

33:24.78
Jasmin
I haven't seen it.

33:25.10
Chibbsy
It's not his fault!

33:25.70
Jasmin
I can't comment.

33:26.15
Chibbsy
That's an illness!

33:31.52
Jasmin
i haven't seen it i can't come in All right, my friend, thank you for joining me. Thanks for filling in.

33:37.62
Chibbsy
Oh, no worries. That's not great. i hope was all right.

33:40.43
Jasmin
yeah Yeah, I hope it was all right too. Any closing statements? Anything you want the listeners to know about how hot you are or anything else?

33:51.68
Chibbsy
No, that there are so many video clips from 1001 Songs That Make You Want to Die or Screech and Roll that they are more than aware of what I look like now. This is actually something that might become an issue because forever we've done these podcasts completely faceless for almost six years.

34:11.29
Chibbsy
And now there's videos everywhere. And I feel like everyone's starting to be a little bit more well behaved now they're being filmed. But there's six years of stuff where we were not being filmed that now you can go back and know exactly who the person was that said it.

34:27.69
Chibbsy
And that might be an issue. I'm also waiting for someone to like king hit me at a Hawks game for some hot take I've made about the Hawks. So we'll see. Could be an interesting season for us.

34:39.27
Jasmin
You're an objective person. Anything you've said, i would imagine people are thinking the same thing. They're just on there going, he's saying what we're all thinking.

34:47.64
Chibbsy
but yeah Yeah, that's probably right. Yeah.

34:49.60
Jasmin
Yeah, okay. Thank you for those closing remarks, you incredibly handsome man. and well We will catch you next time.